The Immaculate Grid of Football

Sports Reference yesterday launched an Immaculate Grid for football, an enjoyable quiz requiring amateur sports researchers to dig deep within the recesses of their brains for long-forgotten information, or make use of pro-football-reference.com, among other resources, to learn some new things. Today's grid was challenging, with an average score of just 5.6 as of this post, but research in pursuit of a high score can uncover some of those forgotten bits of trivia. In pursuit of a perfect score in today's game, one might find, as this blogger did, that in 2020 Adrian Peterson was Detroit's rushing leader with 604 yards on the ground, and that Terrell Owens was the top receiver for Buffalo in 2009. Regrettably, Owens was never a member of the Cardinals, Lions, or Jets, any of which would have filled a square on the left third of today's grid. There are far more simple ways to fill in the grid than guess and check, but where's the fun in that? Front Office Sports' David Rumsey writes that Sports Reference will add to its collection of games with more Immaculate Grids in the near future, and one can't help but imagine how much fun a college football or professional basketball version of the game might be.

Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Football: Baltimore's Big Free Agent Signing

*Note: This is the final post in a series of fictional installments that uses the MCU's Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Madness as a jumping off point to football "what ifs." 

The old quarterback eases into the booth at ESPN Zone and smiles. A writer had offered to bring him to one of Baltimore’s best steakhouses, but he insisted on bringing his entire family here instead. He always vowed they’d come first, and they’re the reason he’s here after so many years in the bayou. He loves New Orleans, but with a rebuild coming, he knew that to live his dream of winning another championship, he’d need to move on.

That’s how Drew Brees ended up a Baltimore Colt.

Back in the 1980s, the Colts franchise considered leaving the city it’s called home since 1953.

“When Elway signed his rookie contract, that really changed the entire trajectory of this franchise,” said Colts owner Jim Irsay, whose father, Bob, was in talks to move the Colts to Indianapolis, Indiana, before John Elway inked a deal that guaranteed him $1.5 million per year over a 7-year period. “It set us up for years to come.”

After years of success without a Lombardi Trophy, Elway led the franchise to its first Super Bowl victory in nearly 30 years in 1998, as the Colts defeated the Packers thanks to Elway’s gutsy running and a Marshall Faulk plunge into the end zone late in the fourth quarter. The next year, with yet another future Hall of Famer in the fold, the Colts won a second straight Super Bowl, this time over the Falcons, prompting Elway to retire and hand the reins to his understudy Peyton Manning.

Manning won a title of his own before passing the baton to Andrew Luck, who in turn took the Colts back to the Big Game with a victory over the Carolina Panthers in Super Bowl 50. But when Luck abruptly retired following the 2018 season, the Colts were left without a true franchise QB for the first time in decades. Philip Rivers, Matt Ryan, and even Carson Wentz tried their hand at bringing one of the NFL’s proudest franchises back to the promised land, but none stuck. The Colts are hoping that this time will be different.

“Drew gives us as good a chance at winning a Super Bowl as we’ve had in a really long time,” said Elway, now general manager of the franchise he quarterbacked for 16 years.

Brees will be flanked by a two-headed backfield receiving monster of Jonathan Taylor and Nyheim Hines. Paired with Michael Pittman, the recently signed JuJu Smith-Schuster, and a still-prime Kenny Golladay, the Colts have the makings of one of the NFL’s elite offenses, the perfect opportunity for Brees to put a bow on a Hall of Famer career.

It still hurts for Brees that he left New Orleans. He was a fixture in the city for 15 years, providing relief in the form of a Super Bowl championship after Hurricane Katrina devastated the city. But with the Saints set to move to more of a downfield passing attack, the short game the team ran to perfection for so long was a better fit elsewhere.

“The city of New Orleans will always be a part of me,” said Brees. “And a piece of me will always belong to the city as well.”

It seems like ancient history, but Brees actually began his career on the West Coast, playing five seasons in the powder blues of San Diego before signing on with New Orleans after a shoulder injury caused the Chargers to look elsewhere for a QB in one of the ill-fated decisions in NFL history.

From there, Brees’ legend began to rise.

It began with a challenge to the then single-season record of 5,084 pass yards that Dan Marino tossed for the undefeated Miami Dolphins in 1984. Then, Brees took the Saints to the promised land after so many years of mediocrity, healing a city’s deep wounds, and being named Sports Illustrated’s “Sportsperson of the Year” in the process. He followed that up with three more seasons of 5000 passing yards. Now he can add to a hall of fame career and make it, quite possibly, a second-tier G.O.A.T. career, behind only recently-retired Tom Brady.

“I’m beyond excited to see what comes next. For the city, for this franchise…. It’s great to be a Colt,” said Brees.

For now, the old quarterback practices his short field passing at one of the arcade games, his oldest son tossing footballs alongside him in friendly competition. Every one of Drew’s tosses hits its intended target, a small opening in a plastic sheet where a wide receiver’s outstretched hands reach for the football.

The old quarterback still has it.

Long Snappers (?!) and the Pro Football Hall of Fame

I read Alex Prewitt's article in Sports Illustrated yesterday about long snappers in the NFL, and I couldn't help but think about whether the position deserves a spot in the Pro Football Hall of Fame. In the piece, Prewitt details how difficult contests became for teams that lost their long snappers midgame, such as the Cincinnati Bengals' defeat to the Steelers this year stemming from their long snapper's torn biceps. If a player is that valuable to his squad that his injury leads almost directly to a loss, shouldn't one of their fraternity at least be considered for induction into the Hall? It's a highly specific job no less important than kicker or punter, so I think it's time for someone to get a spot in Canton.

How might we decide which player to cast in bronze? For starters, we need to know some of their names, as long snappers are some of the more anonymous players on the field. Zak DeOssie seems like an interesting choice following two Super Bowl victories with the New York Giants. He and his father were both mentioned by John Turney in "Top Holders and Long Snappers in NFL History" as top ten players all-time at the position. Don Muhlbach is also mentioned by Turney, and Kyle Meinke of mlive.com in this 2021 article. So while it's a little late for this year, maybe Muhlbach, one of the DeOssies, or one of the many other players mentioned by Turney is worthy of consideration in 2024. It's time the position got its due.

Now for the holders ....

Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Football: What if Colleges Played in the NFL's Offseason?

Last year, in a bit of a creative vomiting, I wrote down a ton of ideas for a series of blog posts called "Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Football." While some of my ideas were interesting to say the least, there is something I find rather intriguing regarding my plans for "Earth-4000." In my typed notes, I sketched a rough timeline for playing NFL football in the fall and NCAA football beginning about a week after the Super Bowl. Now that I review my ideas again, I find them to have some merit, along with a number of terrifying drawbacks.

Should the universe align for this type of setup, the entire year becomes a staggeringly packed feast of pigskins and potato chips, dramatic football nearly every weekend. Spacing the schedule out would allow summer holidays to be adorned with the likes of Ohio State and Alabama, Memorial Day weekend hosting conference championships and the College Football Playoff finals moving six months from their current spot in January to the Fourth of July. The NFL starts up again in early August with the preseason, giving the United States of Football only a month of pigskin-less weekends each calendar year. NFL coaches could focus themselves by worrying only about their teams during the season, while saving the spring for scouting.

Of course, while this idea would be fun for a little while, the sports-loving world would get burnt-out on football by, say, 2025 or so. Even though football is fun, the nation would be unable to sustain a year-round Super Bowl party in perpetuity. I'm not so sure the NFL would be pleased by the idea either. Part of its success is based on offseason coverage of events like free agency, the combine, and the NFL Draft. Where would the media look if the NFL Draft was Thursday night but Auburn played Alabama on Saturday afternoon? It'd definitely be interesting, but if Alabama's defensive star gets drafted a mere 48 hours prior to facing Auburn, would he really give up millions to play in a rivalry game?

That brings us to perhaps the biggest drawback of them all: nostalgia. The Iron Bowl is always played on Thanksgiving weekend. Army and Navy square off each fall in one of the most traditional rivals in existence. And even if the Rose Bowl is swallowed by the College Football Playoff, can we really imagine it being played in the heat of June or July instead of early January? So while the idea I came up with here is an intriguing one, I think it's best to leave spring football to the USFL and XFL, professional leagues that entertain us, but are less traditional and do somewhat less business, giving them the elasticity to schedule during a conventionally non-football time of year. If nothing else, at least they let us explore the possibilities of spring football without fundamentally altering our (sports) world. College football in the spring just won't work. It's too much to destroy not only the fabric of the sport, but also the business models of some of the biggest, most successful leagues on the planet. 

Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Football: Earth-838 Has Football on Summer Holidays

*Note: This is the first post in a series of fictional installments that uses the MCU's  Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Madness as a jumping off point to football "what ifs." It contains spoilers for the newest Dr. Strange.

Dr. Stephen Strange and Miss America Chavez on May 6 traveled to Earth-838's United States while fighting the Scarlet Witch. During their trip, Strange and Chavez reported a number of significant differences between 838 and Earth-616, including key variations in the way football is played.

On 838, the United States has 72 professional football teams that are all part of the same organization, according to Strange and Chavez. The NFL has 36 franchises, and each major league team has an affiliated franchise in the Minor Football League (MFL).

"All of America was excited to see football on Memorial Day weekend, too," said Chavez. Each NFL team unites with its minor league affiliate for combined spring games on both Memorial Day weekend and the 4th of July, similar to what colleges and universities do in April and May here on 616, both Chavez and Strange said.

"It's really special for the fans to be able to come out and see a little football in the offseason," said 838's Roger Goodell, who like our Goodell has been NFL commissioner since the mid-2000s. "There are some differences from the regular season. Fans have the opportunity to really get up close and personal with their favorite players, something that just isn't able to happen from September to February."

During offseason games, fans are allowed to stand in designated areas on the sidelines and chat with players. Some teams have even allowed fans to try their hand at coaching.

"We give them specific plays to choose from, but fans have run our offense during spring and summer games in the past," said 838's Bill Belichick, head coach of the five-time Super Bowl champion Cleveland Browns. "They really seem to enjoy it."

Asked if the "fans as coaches" attraction was something the NFL could go to in this universe, 616's Roger Goodell said, "it's not something that's on the table right now, but we'd never rule anything out. Our number one priority is the fans, and if calling plays in preseason games is something they might like, we'll consider it."

In Defense of Tom Brady and the Unretirements of Legends

Tom Brady announced tonight that he will unretire and head back to Tampa Bay to help the Buccaneers franchise try for its third-ever Super Bowl title. While there are likely fans and pundits alike who believe the G.O.A.T. should have stayed in his rocking chair, Tom Terrific deserves to go out on his own terms.

When I told someone I know the news of Brady's comeback, he said when the quarterback finally does call it quits, we might remember that he used to be good, not that he still is. But a player who's won almost twice as many Super Bowls as any other quarterback in one of the most competitive sports leagues in the world has earned the right to try to be remembered in whatever way he wants to.

Plus, it's not easy for any athlete who loves their sport to call it quits, let alone the G.O.A.T. I'm nowhere near as talented as Brady, but I remember feeling almost like I'd missed an appointment the first time fall rolled around and I wasn't on a football team anymore. Brady can control when he walks away as much or more than anyone who's ever played the game. The only football player who comes to mind as being able to walk away on his terms was John Elway, who ended his career with two straight Super Bowl wins. Why shouldn't Brady come back and give it another shot if retirement didn't feel right, especially after an early exit in last season's playoffs? The legend, after all, has more than earned the right to go out the way he wants to, not the way armchair general managers might tell him to.

Washington Now in Command

The NFL's Washington, D.C. football team today revealed its new nickname that replaces the racist moniker the team employed from 1933 until 2019. The team is now the Washington Commanders.

I like the new nickname because it feels important and powerful, as if the team is a group of leaders on a critical mission. At the same time, it's not overly important or stiff. "Commanders" is a dynamic military nickname, reminding me of the San Diego Fleet in the now-defunct AAF.

The uniforms are sharp, with a new stencil-style font for the "W" on the side of the helmet. The home jerseys declare "Commanders" on the front, using a line above and below the name to make it stand out.

My initial reaction upon seeing a leaked photo of a Commanders t-shirt last night was that the nickname would jibe with the American tradition more if the team's colors were red, white, and blue. But I'm happy the team's primary colors remain the longtime burgundy and gold. Perhaps the franchise can come up with an alternate uniform and logo that includes red, white, and blue to keep the team tradition alive and simultaneously bring an important piece of America to the franchise. They are based in America's capital, after all.